Jesus Loves You(Matthew 5:4) 耶稣爱你(马太福音5:4)
Author: Sis Jean Ong
I was in a period of grief last year, having lost my sister Soh Khim in Nov 2019. It was a difficult time for me, especially during the Circuit Breaker. Whenever I thought of her, I would weep bitterly alone in my room. She was very dear to me. She was my closest friend. We used to do many things together, came to the same church and joined the same fellowship, went for holidays together….
The COVID19 pandemic hit Singapore in late January and NRCS centre had to cease all activities in February. I could only stay in church to work. During the Circuit Breaker, it was especially quiet in the church as there were only my hubby and I in “a big house” all the time. I felt so bored and kept thinking of my sister. I tried to keep myself busy with learning new crafts from Youtube, reading and listening to music so that I could stop thinking of her, but it did not really help. I prayed to God and asked Him many questions about my sister’s passing, but my grief did not go away.
April is a period when flowers bloom. So did the tree in front of our church. Beautiful yellow flowers started to fill the tree, but within days, the flowers started to fall, and the ground looked unpleasant. It was like that for a few days and one early morning around six, I decided to sweep the withered flowers and dry leaves outside the gate of our church. As I was sweeping, a young Indian man walked to me and said in Mandarin, “Jesus loves you”. I was stunned and I did not know how to react. He repeated himself with the same words and I smiled to him and said, “same to you” in Mandarin. He then walked away.
Suddenly, I realised that God had sent his message of love to me. I believe meeting the Indian man was no coincidence, especially when he only said the three words “Jesus loves you” in Mandarin, and not in English, not any other greetings like “Good morning” or “Shalom”. I felt very much comforted and warm that God understands my loss and my pain. I still miss my sister, but I am not afraid to talk to others about her. I can face “her passing”. Thanks to God for His love and His grace.
“Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.” (Matthew 5:4)
文：翁素昭师母
翻译：王佩瑾师母
去年，我度过了一段悲痛时期。2019年11月，我失去了我亲爱的姐姐，素琴。那是一段特别难过的日子，尤其是在实施阻断措施的时候。每当想起她，我都会偷偷地躲在房间哭泣。她对我而言是十分亲近，也是我最好的 朋友。我们曾经结伴做过许多事，参加同一间教会、同一个团契、一起去旅游……
2020年1月下旬，新加坡因受2019疫情的影响，恩邻中心不得不在2月停止所有活动，而我也只能在教会办公。阻断措施期间，教会特别冷清。整栋大房子里只有我和老公二人。当时我闷得发慌，也因此不停地想着姐姐。我试图让自己忙碌，藉着上网学习新的手工、阅读和听音乐，好让自己不会一直想起她。但是，那一切都是徒然的。我向上帝祈祷，并且问祂很多关于姐姐过世的问题，但是悲伤依然随行。
四月是花开的季节。教会门前那棵树也开花了。美丽的小黄花开满整棵树，但是没几天，它们都开始凋谢了。地上也因此盖满凋零的花朵，难看极了。就这样过了几天，某日清晨6点左右，我决定拿扫把把教会门前凋谢的花儿和干枯的叶子打理干净。扫着扫着，突然，有一位印度青年走向我，并用华语对我说，“耶稣爱你”。我当时楞着了，不知该如何回应。那位印度青年重复了刚才说的话，我便对他微笑，用华语对他说，“祂也爱你”。然后他就离开了。
我突然意识到上帝刚向我传达了爱的讯息。我相信与那位印度青年的相遇并非偶然，尤其是他并不是用英语，或是说了普通的“早安“或”平安“等问候的语，而是用中文对我说了四个字：“耶稣爱你”。我感到十分安慰，心里非常暖和，因为上帝知道我因失去姐姐而感到的伤痛和失落。我虽然仍然惦记姐姐，但我不再害怕向别人提起她。我终于可以面对她已经过世的事实。感谢主的爱与恩典。